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8-1-06
I awoke in darkness.  For a second, I wasn’t sure where I was at or what I was doing.  Then the horror of the day’s events came racing back into my mind, tearing a scream from my throat.  I tore open the flap of my tent and stumbled out into the clearing that made up our campsite.
“Dad,” I croaked with fear and thirst, “Mom?  Where are you?”
I listened intently to the sounds of the forest at night.  Crickets chirped their melody that seemed to keep up with the ever increasing beat of my terrified heart.  Deep breaths racked my body.  Overhead, the full moon hung heavy and low like some sick, bloated eyeball.  It was watching me from the dark sea of sky as I twirled helplessly in the middle of my own nightmare.  Only this nightmare was true.
“DAD!” I yelled louder.  My skin was really starting to itch.  I scratched it with wild abandon, ignoring the burning sensations that came afterwards.  I wondered if I was breaking out in a rash…from the spice…that horrible powder.
I heard a low moan come from the other side of my tent.  My feet stopped twirling and my mind went into overdrive.  What in the world was there?  I was afraid to say anything and afraid not to say anything.
“Dad?” I said again, lower this time.
“They…they can’t…they,” it was my brother Jake.  His voice sounded muffled…strange.  Maybe he was having a reaction to the powder as well.  I started to walk around the tent to see him but I stopped.  Something was wrong.  I scratched my arms and legs again.  They were itching so much!  I couldn’t take it!
“What’s wrong Jake!” I called out, “Where is Mom and Dad?”
“They can’t…can’t…” he started out, “They went out into the woods.  They wanted to see for themselves.”
I started walking toward the sound of Jake’s voice.  My heart started to beat faster.  It felt like it was going to explode right through my itching, burning chest.  His voice….it wasn’t quite right.  Something was off about it.
“Jake…are you alright?” I asked, slowing down.  Suddenly, I didn’t want to know.
“They wanted to see it for themselves,” Jake said again…and then he laughed.
That laugh made me stop dead in my tracks.  It was so low…so throaty…so guttural.  It didn’t sound human.
“They saw alright,” he grunted.  It sounded like he was having trouble breathing.
“Jake, stop it!” I cried out, “You’re scaring me.”
“Scaring her, she says,” he laughed again.  I moaned and started walking toward him again.  Something had happened to him alright.  He sounded like he had gone crazy.
“I heard them, you know,” he kept on talking in that strange voice, “I heard them screaming.  I heard that thing….rip into them.  Their screams…so long…so loud.  Screaming and screaming and screaming.  And then silence.  And then crunching.  Bones….crunching.”
“NO!” I screamed out, running around the tent to face what my brother had become, “Stop it Jake…..stop telling lies!”
For a second, I thought that I was seeing things.  A strange effect of fear and night shadows.  My brother was still my brother…but not for long.  He had changed.
He was lying on the ground….shaking like he was freezing to death.  Dark hair had sprouted across his entire body.  He had ripped his shirt off of himself.  His claws kept scratching at his skin…ripping it off of his body.  His claws were long and dark.  But the worst were his eyes.  Black pools of evil gleamed up at me in the moonlight.  As I screamed out, he laughed again.  Long fangs gleamed in the moonlight. 
“NO….DEAR GOD NO!” my own strange voice called out.  I looked down and realized with horror that I was changing as well.
Fur was sprouting from my body.  Already my fingers were replaced with long black claws.  I could feel myself start to fade away.  I was being replaced with something else.  I tried to scream and found that I couldn’t.  In the night, I heard the lonesome screech of a beast instead.  Only this time…the beast was me.
In the dark of the forest, she slowly crept to the old cabin.  Aged beyond any numbering of years, her long gray hair hung like an oily mop in her haggard face.  Her toothless mouth worked on its own like it belonged to someone else.  Not that she needed it for anything other than eating.  She hadn’t spoken in over 100 years. 
She seemed to glide like mist over the ground as she entered the cabin door.  Although they were covered with a heavy film, her eyes saw the hole in the floor.  Her children had been very busy today.  A throaty, phlegm coated gurgle came out of her mouth.  It was the closest thing to a laugh that she could muster.
Stealing her way to the fireplace, she took the bag of spice that she clutched in her gnarled hands and placed it in the hiding place….just as she had been doing for the last century or so. 
Some knew her as the voice of the mountain.  Some knew her as the creeping death of the night hills.  Others simply knew her as Elsbeth. 
The spice would wait.  The spice would be here when some other lost soul happened to follow a little blue bird into the cabin.  The spice was her one certainty.  It would work its dark magic on the lost children of the forest…and ensure her continued life…such as it was.  It was part of the pact that she had made to the Darkness all those years ago.  Their lives…for hers. 
Life was life…such as it was.  In the distance, she could hear the screams of the two new lost souls as they tore through the forest…searching for food.  They would find the food they seeked….or at least the remains of what was left. 
With a wave of her hand, she vanished.  In her place stood a tuft of blue feathers.  With a flick of wings, it flew up the chimney and into the night.
The evil of Elsbeth would continue on.
Somewhere on a lone strip mine in Breathitt County, a night watchman stood his guard.  In the distance, he could hear the lonely, fierce howls of the coyotes.  At least he assumed they were coyotes.  It sounded like they had found something to eat.  He could just make out their growls and  the crunching of bones.
We shivered as a dark cloud passed over the full moon.  He hated this job. 
I hope that you all enjoyed this little story of mine.  It was fun to write.  Honestly, I didn’t know where it was going when summer started!  Be on the lookout for Elsbeth!  Until next week….class dismissed.

7-13-06
The snorting of the beast grew louder under out feet.  I felt Jake cling to me as the dirt began to move on the floor of the old cabin.  The creature was seconds from breaking through.  This was the end.
Then suddenly it hit me.  It was so obvious…it had been all along.  I had just been too panicked to have realized it. 
I tore open the top of the bag of spice that I had found in the old fireplace.
“Close your eyes!” I shouted to Jake, as a black claw tore through the floor.
“Why?” he screamed.
“Just do it or we are going to die!” I yelled back.
Most of the time, Jake would do just the opposite of what I told him to do…little brothers are like that.  Fortunately, this time he decided to listen.  I guess that the threat of death will do that to you!
As soon as his eyes were closed, I dumped half of the bag of spice over Jake’s head. 
“Hold your breath,” I muttered as I quickly wiped him down from head to toe with the brown powder.  The smell became overpowering as I dusted him thoroughly.  I prayed that this would work…it just had to.
Closing my own eyes, I tipped the bag over my head and deposited the rest of the spice onto me.  Even when my breath was held, I could still smell it.  It seemed to have a life of its own. 
The spice was cold.  I started to shiver as it slid off of my hair and down the back of my shirt.  It didn’t feel like it was falling on me.  It felt like it was….crawling.  Like it was alive!  I rubbed my hands over my clothes….really working the powder in good.
I opened my eyes and looked at Jake.  He was staring at the floor.  His face, hair, clothes, and even his shoes had taken on the odd brown color of the spice.  I tried to breathe through my nose, but the powder whooshed up my nostrils making my  cough and sputter.
“Kkkack…come…kkaack…on,” I grabbed Jake by the wrist and flung him toward the door, “Let’s make a break for it.”
Just then the floor opened up underneath my feet and I fell.  I looked down and saw the black evil eyes of the creature as it snarled it dripping fangs.  On reflex, I shook the bag of spice…now nearly empty…toward its face.  Brown residue flew into its eyes, making it roar with a mixture of anger and pain.  It clawed at its face, trying to rake the spice from its nostrils.
I jumped up and pushed Jake out the door.  It was now or never.  We wouldn’t have another chance at escape.
“Run!” I screamed, “No matter what…just keep running.”
My legs felt like rubber.  I knew that we weren’t going to escape the evil terror that lay behind us.  It would be after us in a flash of fur, teeth, and ripping claws.  There was no way that two kids could ever get away from something like that…something so evil and unnatural.  We were doomed.
My lungs ached to bring in more air, but all that I could breathe in was particles of spice….setting my lungs on fire.  I could feel my heart racing, trying to keep up with my mind….faster, faster…must go faster.
Branches from trees lunged toward my face, scratching and clawing at my eyes.  A thorny bush grabbed my legs and threatened to trip me as I kept pushing Jake forward.  I tried to listed for breaking branches behind us as the beast ran us down…but my ears were whirling with panic.  The only thing that I could hear was myself as I cried out in fear.  I could feel hot tears burn their tracks down my dirty face.
The spice was starting to burn my skin.  I could feel it working its way down deep into my pores.  Sweat ran into my eyes, bringing the spice with it.  My vision blurred as the spice stung and bit.  My stomach rolled as the overpowering smell of the spice seemed to turn from a pleasant smell into a stench that reeked like rot and decay.  Like the dead, my mind conjured up from some distant horror movie that I had seen.
I thought that I heard a roar behind me…could feel hot breath down the back of my neck…hot foamy saliva dripping on my skin.  I glanced back in horror, knowing that I would see the snarling face of the beast…of Elsbeth.  Nothing was there.  My head flew back around…and I felt strong arms grab me!
“Noooooo!” I screamed, struggling to break free from certain death.
“Elizabeth!” it was a voice that I instantly recognized.  It was my dad.
I took another look around.  I was back at camp!  Jake was lying on the ground in front of me…panting and crying.  I screamed again and ripped myself from my father’s arms.
“We’ve got to get out of here!  It’s right behind us!” I was screaming and flapping my arms like some overgrown bird trying to take flight. “We’ve got to…”
And then the world seemed to swim before my eyes, like I was looking at it from underwater.  The smell of the spice was everywhere.  It enveloped me like a burning cocoon.  And like a caterpillar, I sank to the ground.  Darkness overtook me and led me to a place where I was safe…where the horror of Elsbeth could not come.  Sleep was blissful.

6-29-06
I know that I whisked around quickly, although it seemed like it took me forever.  It was like everything was running in slow motion.  For a second, I thought that I was seeing things.  My eyes went all fuzzy and my brain hurt at what I was seeing.
No!  I thought to myself.  I can’t be seeing what I’m seeing.  That’s impossible.
The creature stood on two legs.  It wore a faded blue gingham dress that was ripped up the left sleeve.  The bottom looked like it had been drug repeatedly through the mud, and there was a dark stain down the front that could have been dried food.  Or dried blood, my mind raced.  Something wet and green that looked like snot was smeared all over both sleeves.
Although it was covered in course hair, the creature was obviously female.  Large black claws curled on the end of long…extra long…fingers which were practically touching the ground.  A long string of drool hung like a loose rubber band from the thing’s lips which were parted in a fierce, toothy snarl.  Black liquid pools of evil served as the creatures eyes, and I could see my reflection deep inside them…like I was lost in the dark.  A low growl was coming from its throat as it slowly approached us from some dense undergrowth.  It must have been watching us the entire time!
“Argh ranna bllot,” the creatures teeth flashed as it gargled, “Argh ranna bllot….rallp!”
Both Jake and I stood frozen like deer caught in headlights as the creature slowly advanced.  As it got closer, I could smell the incredible stench of the beast.  It smelled of old rot, decaying meat, and…something worse.  I think that it was the smell that finally jolted me into action.
“Jake…run!” I screamed, grabbing my younger brother by the shoulder and whirling him around.  Both of us took off through the woods, scrambling with wild panic as a roar of rage and hunger bellowed out behind us.  Without looking back, I knew that it was right behind us.
If one of us trips, we’re dead, my mind was a wild bird, flying around a room and trying to find a way out.
“This can’t be happening…this can’t be happening,” Jake was panting beside me over and over again, “This can’t be..”
“Jake!” I yelled, pushing him forward, “Shut up and run!”
My legs were pumping like crazy.  My breath was coming in short, hot gasps, and an incredible pain was starting to form in my side.  I knew where we had to go!
“Go to the left Jake,” I screamed, “We’ve got to make it back to that cabin!”
Something snapped sharp against my leg and I let out another scream.  I was sure that the creature had bitten into my leg.  I looked down quickly to see that it was just a branch that had flown back and hit my leg.  Up ahead, I could see the cabin.  I only hoped that we would make it in time.  I could hear crashing and snarling behind us.  
“Argh ranna bllot!” I could hear the creature howling with rage as it closed in on us.  I wasn’t sure if we were going to make it to the cabin alive or not.
Just as we entered the clearing to the cabin, Jake let out a yelp and fell face down into the dirt.  His face hit the ground hard.  I knew that this was bad.
“Jake!” I screamed, stopping and rolling him over.  Blood was pouring out of his nose and his eyes had rolled back into his head, “Jake…wake up.  We’ve got to get out of here.  I can’t pack you…wake up!”
A fierce throaty growl sounded right behind me mixed with a howl of victory.  I waited for the inevitable.  We were going to be ripped apart by that thing!
“Mmmmm,” Jake’s eyes focused and for a second he looked confused…and then he screamed out in terror.
“Come on!” I yelled, dragging him up by his arm.  I took a second to glance behind us.  The creature was not more than 10 feet behind us.  It was running on all fours…like a dog…or a…or a…wolf, I thought.  I let out one last scream as we bolted through the door of the cabin and slammed the door shut. 
Good job!  I thought angrily to myself,  Now you all are trapped in here.  That rotten door had holes in it…it isn’t going to hold that monster back!
I waited for the creature to burst through the door.  I looked around the room for something that I could use as a weapon…a stick….a chair…anything.  I was crying out loud from fear and exhaustion as I stumbled around the room.
“Jake…Jake…” was all that I managed to say.
We were both crying.  I tried to hold myself together…to be strong for my little brother…but this was just too much. 
“What’s going on here!” I shrieked, pounding my fists on the wall of the old cabin.  I could still smell that spice as it invaded my nostrils with each gasp of terror that I made.
“Hey….wait a minute,” Jake was holding his bleeding nose as he limped over to the dirty little window, “I think….that it left.  Listen…you can’t hear it anymore.”
I stopped moving like a crazy person around the room and tried to get control of my breathing.  As my heartbeat and breathing slowed down, I realized that he was right.  The howling had stopped. 
“Do you think it is still out there?” I asked cautiously as I tiptoed over to the window where Jake was standing.
“I don’t know,” he murmured, “Owww….my nose is killing me!”
I took a look at his busted nose.  Most of the bleeding had stopped.  It looked like it was going to swell a little, but I thought that he would be fine….if we could get away from the creature in one piece, that is!
I took another peek out of the window.  I didn’t see anything outside…not that it was easy to see through the layers of grime.
“I’m gonna’ take a peek out of the window,” I whispered, “You stay here.”
Jake nodded as I slowly crept toward the door.  With a whisper of a prayer, I cautiously opened the door a crack and stuck my face to the opening.
“Argh ranna bllot!” echoed through the air as the creature lunged toward my face….fangs dripping with hot, foamy slobber.  I let out a scream….there was no escape!

6-16-06
A cold chill ran down my back.  I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
“It’s not…not human, is it?” Jake whispered.
“No,” I answered, “It’s some kind of an animal.  Maybe a dog?”
I bent over and took a closer look.  The grave was old.  Covered with weeds and old leaves, it lay in a small clearing in the forest.  It was a rather large grave, so I knew that it had to be for an adult.  Not a child. 
I peered at the skull.  It definitely looked like a dog or a wolf.  I could see large sharp teeth still attached.  The dark holes that had once held eyes stared back at me.  I shivered and stood up again. 
“Yeah,” I said, “I think that it is a dog’s skull.”
“Who would put a dog’s skull on someone’s grave?” Jake asked, walking around behind the old flat rock that stood for a gravestone.
I didn’t know how to answer him.  I just stood there staring at the grave.  Who was buried here?  What kind of life had they led?  Did this skull belong to their dog?  These and a million other questions were swirling through my mind.  I wondered if this was the person who had lived in the abandoned house.
“Beth!” Jake cried out, staring in horror at the gravestone, “Come look at this!”
I quickly ran around the grave.  I was careful not to step on it.  I know that it sounds silly but I never walk on graves.  I know that it’s not like I’m going to wake anybody up or anything.  I just don’t like it.
Jake was pointing to the gravestone.  I took one look and my blood froze in my veins.
Elsbeth.  Just one word.  One name.  It had been crudely carved into the rock by someone long ago.  The elements had worn it away so that it was almost unreadable.  And yet, there it was. 
“Elsbeth,” Jake whispered, “It sounds like Elizabeth.  Like…your name.”
Another chill ran down my back.  It was just a silly coincidence.  It had to be.  But still, it’s not everyday that you see a gravestone with your name carved into it.  I grabbed Jake by the hand.
“Wait a minute,” Jake pulled away, “There’s something else carved into the stone.  Look there!”
I kneeled down and gently brushed away dirt that had blown into the nearly worn away grooves someone had carved long ago.  I pulled my hand away with a gasp as I read what was printed on the tombstone.  Elsbeth...may the evil never escape.
“Come on,” I said firmly, “Let’s get out of here.  I don’t feel right about this.  Let’s just go.”
He nodded, never taking his eyes off of the gravestone, “OK Beth.  Let’s go back to camp.”
“Let’s go.  This way,” I said, wiping my face.  I was suddenly feeling rather hot.  I hoped that I wasn’t getting sick.
I turned around and started walking back toward the house.  Jake followed behind me.  I made sure that he kept up with me.  I didn’t want to get lost again.  I hoped that he could find his way back to camp.  He was usually really good at stuff like that.
Everything around us was so green and lush.  I loved the way that the sunlight filtering through the leaves danced with little flickers on the ground.  It made the darkness and dampness of the morning seem so far away.  I started thinking about the house again.  It was so odd, just standing there in the middle of the forest. 
My throat was burning with thirst.  That chocolate bar had been so good, but now all I wanted was a drink of cold water.  I thought about sucking some rainwater off of the leaves around me, but I didn’t want to take a chance at getting sick.  My dad had told me that sometimes bacteria can live on the leaves and get into the rainwater.  It wasn’t safe to drink.
I tried to imagine how I would have lived if I had been alive 100 years ago.  I would probably have lived in a little house like the one that I had found.  I would probably have gotten my water from a stream or creek.  I wouldn’t have worried about bacteria or microorganisms or anything like that.  Of course, people back then died early. 
I was lost in my thoughts when I suddenly noticed that I wasn’t on the path anymore.  I stopped quickly.
“Ooof,” Jake said, slamming into my back.  Obviously, he hadn’t been paying much attention either.
“Uh, Jake,” I said nervously, “Do you know where we are?  I think I’ve got us mixed up somehow.”
Jake stood for a second looking around him as though lost in thought.  I started to ask him what was wrong when he held up a hand to shush me.  I was starting to wonder if my little brother hadn’t gone all psycho when I finally heard what he was hearing….a low steady growl.  It was coming from directly behind us!

6-12-06
“No!”  I cried out, struggling to get away from whatever was on top of me.  I felt hot breath on the back of my neck.  At any moment, I just knew that I was going to feel sharp teeth sink into me.  I tried to scream, but nothing was coming out. 
As I kicked my legs, I heard laughter.  And I recognized it immediately.
“Jake!” I screamed, finally throwing my brother, who was now laughing uncontrollably, off of me and onto the floor.
Angrily, I stood up and looked down at my 9 year old brother who was rolling back and forth on the floor and holding his stomach.
He thought that it was the funniest thing that he had ever seen.  But my heart was still racing! 
“Hey Jake, that wasn’t funny!” I screamed at him, stomping out of the house and back into the gloomy undergrowth of the large trees.  Ahead, I could see sunshine poking through in various places.  It appeared that the rain had stopped.
I took a deep breath of air, trying to clear my lungs of the stale, spicy smell of the house.  I closed my eyes and tried to get my heartbeat to return to normal. 
“You should have heard yourself yell,” Jake said from behind me. 
He was still chuckling as he came out to stand next to me.  Casually, he bent over and picked up a rather large stick that was lying on the ground.  Another giggle escaped from his lips as he started writing his name in the dirt.  Every giggle made me madder and madder!
“You weren’t really that scared, were you?” he asked, glancing over at me, “What were you doing in that old place anyway?”
“Nothing!”  I yelled back at him, “How did you find me, anyway?  I thought that I was lost.”
“No,” he said, throwing the stick down on the ground and pointing over to his right, “The camp is right over there.  I broke some branches so that I could find my way back.  Didn’t you?”
My face turned bright red.  I wasn’t sure if it was because I was still angry or if it was because my little brother knew more about finding his way around in the woods than I did.  I closed my eyes and took another deep breath.  At least I wasn’t lost anymore.
“Look, that doesn’t matter,” I replied, “We had better get back to camp before Mom and Dad get worried.”
“Wait a minute,” Jake said, turning back to the old house, “What is this place anyway?  It looks cool.”
“It’s nothing,” I said, not wanting to go back into the house, “It’s just some old house.  There’s nothing in there that’s interesting.”
Jake walked over to the window and looked through the cloudy glass, “I could see you standing in there.”
“I know,” I said, “I saw your shadow at the window.  I just didn’t know who you were.”
“What?” he asked, turning back toward me with a puzzled look on his face, “I kept calling your name.  I was practically yelling.  I’m surprised that Mom and Dad didn’t hear me.”
I just stared back at him.  I hadn’t heard anything!
“You mean you didn’t hear me?” Jake asked, turning back toward the house, “What is this house made of, anyway?”
I wasn’t feeling well.  My stomach rumbled.  I was hungry.  Also, I wanted to change out of my wet shorts. 
“Come on Jake,” I whined, “Let’s go!”
“Hold on,” Jake said, walking up to the door, “I tried to open this door, but it wouldn’t budge.  When I pushed on the door, my hand sank right into it.  It was so weird.”
“I know,” I said, walking back toward the house, “The same thing happened to me.”
Jake reached and touched the door.  It had some more large holes in it.  I guessed that they had been made by him when he had pushed on the door.
“Did you make those?” I asked, reaching out and touching the door.  It was spongy to the touch.
“Yeah,” he said, breaking off a small piece and holding it to his nose, “I thought that you might be trapped inside so I decided to run into the door.  I didn’t know that my hands were going to sink into it though!”
He took a sniff of the wood and made a strange face. 
“What is it Jake?” I asked, reaching out and breaking off a small piece of the door as well.  It came off easily in my fingers.  I sniffed it.  It had that strange spicy smell that seemed to surround the entire house.
“I don’t know,” he said slowly, “It just smells so familiar.”
Jake put the small piece of wood into his pocket and quickly ran past me toward the back of the house. 
“Jake,” I cried out, tossing my piece of wood on the ground, “Wait!  Where are you going?”
“I was exploring around back when I looked inside and saw you,” Jake had stopped, staring at the trees.
The back of the house had the same sloping, melted look as the front.  The only difference was the back of the stone fireplace jutting out.  I looked at it and my hand absently went to the pocket of my sweatshirt.  I could feel the leather bag inside.  I patted it gently.
“Listen Jake,” I said, “I’m hungry.  Let’s head back now before it starts raining again.”
“Wait Beth,” Jake said, staring straight ahead, “Look at that!  Isn’t that a path?”
I stared in the direction that he was looking.  At first, I couldn’t see anything.  Little by little though, I began to see what he was talking about.  There was a place where the weeds were growing quite so thick.  The trees weren’t quite so close together.  It did look a little bit like a path.
“Let’s explore it,” he said eagerly, running on ahead.
“Jake, wait!” I frowned, “We don’t have time.  We need to get back to camp.”
“Oh, quit being such a baby,” he called back, “Come on.  We’ll just explore for a little while and then we’ll head back.  Here, have a Hershey bar.”
He threw me the chocolate and my stomach grumbled again.  Well, perhaps it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to explore a little bit more.  Besides, Jake seemed to know the way back.  I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t thought about breaking branches to find my own way back.
“Ok Jake,” I sighed, following him, “But just for a few minutes.”
The chocolate was rich and creamy in my mouth.  Immediately I was sorry for eating it because it made me so thirsty that I thought I was going to die.  But that didn’t stop me from finishing it.  I was thirsty anyway.  Might as well finish it now, I thought.
Quickly I stopped to tuck the candy wrapper in the pocket of my shorts.  I didn’t want to be a litter bug.  I looked up and didn’t see Jake anywhere.  He had vanished.
Don’t be silly, I thought, He’s just up ahead on this path.
I broke into a light jog, knowing at any second that I was going to catch sight of my brother’s shock of bright red, curly hair (like my own) or his blue Kentucky sweatshirt that my mom had bought us to wear on our trip. 
“He couldn’t have gotten that far ahead,” I muttered to myself, starting to run faster.
I soon realized that I should have caught up with him.
“Jake?” I yelled, “Where are you?  Where did you go?”
I stopped in the path, panting.  I listened for any sound of my brother, but I couldn’t hear anything. 
He’s hiding, I thought, He’s trying to scare me again.
“Jake!” I yelled out angrily, “This isn’t funny!  I know what you’re doing!”
I listened again, knowing that I would probably hear my brother’s snickering.  I could imagine him hiding behind some of the trees watching me twirl on the path. 
“Ok, fine!” I screamed, “Be that way.  I’m going back to..”
I heard a shout!  It was Jake!
“Jake,” I cried out, breaking into a run, “If you’re playing a joke on me, I swear I’ll get you for this.”
I raced on down the path.  I didn’t hear Jake anymore, and I didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.  Suddenly, up ahead, my brother came into view.  He was just standing there, looking down at the ground.
“Jake,” I yelled, “What’s going on?  I heard you yell.”
Jake just continued to stand there, looking down at the ground.  I grabbed him by the shoulders.  I shook him, making him turn his face toward me.
“Jake?” I asked, “What is it?  Why did you yell?”
He didn’t answer.  He just pointed to the ground.  I looked down and saw what had made him yell.  My heart started pounding again.  It couldn’t be!  Not out here in the middle of the forest.  And yet, there it was.
Silently, we both stood staring at what unmistakably was a grave.  That wasn’t so bad.  It wasn’t like I hadn’t seen graves before.  This one was different though. 
On top of the grave was a skull.

6-7-06
What could be inside?  The bag appeared to be made of brown leather.  It was soft to the touch and had a
worn look as though it had been handled many times. The top of the bag was fastened with a leather tie.  I
carefully undid the knot and opened the bag.  Instantly the strong spicy smell became even stronger
and more intense.  I grimaced slightly as the smell, although not unpleasant, assaulted my nose.  I held my
breath and opened the top of the bag wide so that I could see down inside.
Powder.  It was full of a brown powder.  Why would someone hide powder in the fireplace?
Then I realized that the powder was what was creating the strong spicy smell.  Was this some sort of spice? It made sense.  If someone was using the spice in their cooking, they would want to keep it near the fireplace.  But why would they hide it?  It wasn’t like people were always breaking into other people’s homes so that they could steal their cinnamon or sage.
Why would someone take all of this trouble to hide a bag of brown spice that they probably just used for
cooking?   Because it’s special, you dummy I thought to myself, dipping my fingers into the powder.
I didn’t know how old this bag of spice was, but the powder still felt fresh.  It wasn’t clumped together
or moldy.  At first I was surprised, but then I remembered learning in school that some spices act as
natural preservatives.  In fact, people used to use spices to help preserve certain foods.  If a spice
could keep bacteria from growing in food, it was pretty powerful stuff.  No wonder the spice in the bag
still felt fresh.  Spices could also be used in other ways such as for medicine and for deodorizing a house.
“Well, this place is certainly deodorized!” I muttered, closing the bag and tying it tightly with the leather string. I slipped the bag into the large front pocket of my sweatshirt and zipped it closed.  I didn’t think that
anyone had been in this house for ages.  It wasn’t like I was stealing anything.  I was just – just
discovering things – things that someone had left here to rot many years ago.
I don’t know why I took that bag of spice.  It wasn’t really something that I thought about.  It was just
that I didn’t want to just leave it.  Someone had gone to a lot of trouble to hide it, so it must have been
really important to them.  Also, I thought that it would be cool to show to my friends when I got back to
school after summer break.  If I didn’t have some sort of proof, they would probably never believe me when I
told them about being lost in the woods. Then, it hit me again.  I was lost in the woods.
What if I didn’t see my friends again?  What if I was never found?  Did people still get lost forever?
Surely not!
However, I wasn’t going to just sit here!  Suddenly, the house seemed a lot smaller.  The walls appeared to
be moving in toward me.  I choked on the strong, stale smell of dust and age.  I had to get out of here.
I took one last look at the mirror.  It was so beautiful that I hated to leave it.  For a second, I thought about trying to get it out of the house, but it was so big and heavy that I knew that I probably couldn’t even move it an inch.  Maybe I could come back here later with my dad.  He could probably move it.  That is – if I ever found my dad again. I looked over at the door that had slammed shut.  I had forgotten!  I was locked inside!  How was I ever going to get out of here!  I ran over to the door and tried it again.  It was still locked.  How could this door be so rotten on one side and so hard on the other?  I wondered if I could get through one of the windows. If it wouldn’t open, I could always break the glass and crawl out.  I turned to look at the larger of the two windows – and froze.
For a second, there had been a dark shadow on the other side of the window.  It had quickly pulled away,
but I had had enough time to see it.  There was no mistaking the shape of a head and shoulders.  Someone
had been watching me through the window!  Someone had been right outside this whole time!
My heart started racing!  Who could be out there!  Maybe it’s the person who lives here! my mind raced
Maybe they saw you stealing their spice bag. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest.  The room
had started to spin.  I realized that I was panicking again.
I held my breath and listened carefully.  I couldn’t hear anything except the wild beating of my own heart.
Perhaps I had imagined it.  I didn’t blink an eye.  I kept staring at the pane.  Suddenly, a large dark
shape crossed outside the window again, casting another sinister shadow against the milky, coated
glass. “Ohh!” I cried out, taking a step backwards. A sharp slice of pain cut into my legs as I banged
them into the table.  It scooted on the floor making a loud scraping sound.  If there was someone outside,
they had surely heard that!
Just then, the doorknob started to shake and rattle. I stared in horror, hoping that the door would hold.
Maybe since I couldn’t get out, they couldn’t get in I relaxed a little when the door stopped rattling.  I quickly turned and looked around the room.  Was there someplace that I could hide? 
I was trying to figure out if I could somehow hide behind the large oval mirror in the corner when I heard a loud crash as the door behind me flew open!  I heard something come stumbling up behind me. “No!” a startled scream erupted from me as two hands reached out and grabbed me by the shoulders. A giant shove threw me down on the dirt floor.  It was right on top of me!  I couldn’t get away!

Class Action 5-19-06
My hands flew over my mouth as I started to scream again.  There was someone standing at the back of the room.  They were just standing there, watching me! 
As my heart continued to race, I saw that they had also put their hands over their mouth.  Wait a minute…
It was a mirror!
I let out a sharp snort of laughter as I realized that I had just scared myself with my own reflection.  I took a deep breath of the spicy, stale air and walked past the shiny dark table to the old mirror that stood in the back of the room next to the fireplace.  I hadn’t noticed it earlier, and yet, here it stood. Abandoned by someone long ago, it stood like a silent guard in this old, deserted house.
It was fairly large with an oval shape.  Covered in layers of dust, it still was clean enough to show a reflection of a damp, tired twelve year old girl standing in the middle of a leaning old house in the middle of the forest.  There were dark streaks down my cheeks where I had thrown my hands over my face.  It was that rotten wood!  I quickly brushed my cheeks off with my clean hand.
I reached out carefully to brush the dust off of the mirror.  Like the table, it had a slightly sticky feel to it.  With the dust brushed away, it looked surprisingly good.  There was a decorative border of flowers and birds that ran around the outside edge of the mirror.  They looked like they were made of the same dark wood as the table.  Why would someone leave something so beautiful out here in the middle of nowhere?  I slowly traced one finger over the delicate wood carvings.  They were so beautiful.
Just then I heard a familiar chirping sound coming from beside me.  I turned and saw the blue bird sitting in the leaves that filled the bottom of the fireplace.  Its tiny eyes seemed to smile at me.  It chirped one more time for good measure and then flew up into the chimney.
“Hey there!” I said, dashing over to the fireplace.
I knelt down and stuck my head into the hearth so that I could see up into the chimney.  The stale spicy smell was stronger here, and I could feel my nostrils burning from the scent.  I peered up into the dark chimney.
Above me, I could see light from the opening at the top.  I could also faintly see why the blue bird had led me to this place.  It was standing on a collection of twigs and grasses.  This had to be its nest!  It ruffled its feathers, gave me one last chirp, and flew out the top of the chimney.  For a second, I felt like rushing out of the house and following it, but then I realized that I would probably just get lost again.  Besides, at least I was dry here.  I didn’t want to go back out into the rain.
I was just about ready to turn back and take another look at the mirror when I noticed something brown hanging right above my face inside the chimney.  My curiosity raised, I twisted around so that I could get a better look. 
There was a stone missing from inside the chimney.  Someone had taken it out, leaving a little hollow space behind.  Apparently this was used as some sort of hiding place because a small brown bag had been carefully pushed into it.  I would never have noticed it if I hadn’t been staring at the bird’s nest!  Only a little bit of the bag had been hanging out of the hiding place, and the color almost matched the darkness of the house perfectly.
With trembling fingers, I carefully lifted the bag out of the chimney and scooted back some so that I could see better.  The bag was rather heavy.  There was definitely something inside!  I wondered what it could be.
Maybe it was money.  It could be gold.  Perhaps it was jewels.  My mind started to race at the thought of bringing back a bag of riches to my parents.  We would be set for life!  Then I took another look around at my modest surroundings.  I realized that whoever had lived here probably didn’t store money, gold, or jewels in the fireplace.  They couldn’t even afford to have a real floor!
What could be inside?  The bag appeared to be made of brown leather.  It was soft to the touch and had a worn look as though it had been handled many times.  The top of the bag was fastened with a leather tie.  I carefully undid the knot and opened the bag. 
Instantly the strong spicy smell became even stronger and more intense.  I grimaced slightly as the smell, although not unpleasant, assaulted my nose.  I held my breath and opened the top of the bag wide so that I could see down inside.

Class Action 5-12-06
I stood staring at the house for a few minutes.  I couldn’t believe my good luck!  Now I could get to a telephone or at least to some people. 
“Hey!”  I cried out, running toward the house, “Help!  I’m lost!  I need help!”
As I got closer to the house, I slowed down.  It became obvious to me that the house was abandoned.  Nobody lived here, and from the deserted look of things, they hadn’t lived here in quite some time.
It was a strange little house.  The more that I looked at it, I realized that it wasn’t like any other house that I had ever seen.  For one thing, it was so small.  It couldn’t be much more than two rooms.  Also, it had a round, sloped shape to it like it was melting.  The whole house looked tired.  How old was it?
I walked up to the little dark brown door and knocked.
“Oh!”
I cried out as my hand sunk right through the door.  This house really was old!  The wood was so rotten that it was practically falling apart.  Carefully, I pushed on the door.  I didn’t want the whole thing crashing down on my head.
Slowly, with a rusty creak, the door swung open.  A blast of ancient air hit me in the face.  The house had an odd smell, like herbs or spices.  I couldn’t quite place it.  It was sort of familiar though.  Where had I smelled that smell before?
“Hello?” I called out, knowing that there couldn’t possibly be anyone living in this old, strange house.  Still, I didn’t want to just walk into someone’s house.
When I didn’t hear an answer, I took a small step.  Everything in the house looked like it was on a slant.  I looked to my left and tried to peer out the window, but it was covered with some white moldy powder.  I thought about wiping it off and then remembered what had happened when I had knocked on the door.
The spice smell was even stronger inside the house.  I suddenly felt a little dizzy.  What kind of smell was that?  It seemed so familiar to me.
I had been wrong.  The house was just one room.  The floor was dirt, and I was glad for that.  I could imagine my feet sinking down into some soft, rotten wood from long ago.  It was probably full of termites and other bugs.  I quickly glanced down at my hand.  It had some brown pieces of rotten wood stuck to it, but I didn’t see any bugs.  Thank goodness!
Along the left side of the room was an old bed frame.  It was made of some sturdy branches tied together with some old rope that looked like it was going to fly apart at any minute.  At one time, this frame might have held a mattress of some kind, but it had either been carried away or had rotted away long ago. 
At the far end of the room was a small fireplace.  It appeared to be made of some type of shiny black stone that I couldn’t make out.  There hadn’t been a fire made there in a long time.  Now, there were just a few scattered leaves that were probably the home to some mice.
In the center of the room, there was a long, dark table.  I walked up to it.  It was rectangular with sharp corners.  In fact, it was the only thing in the room that had sharp corners.  It looked out of place.  Everything else about the house looked old and abandoned.  But this table looked almost brand new.  It’s dark wood gleamed, even in the dark gloom of the room.
“Weird” I whispered to myself, reaching out a hand to stroke the dark, shiny wood of the table.  It was solid, but it felt slightly sticky to the touch.  I wondered what kind of wood it was.
Wham!
I let out a scream as the door slammed shut behind me.  I whirled around and ran back to it.  I pushed against it, expecting my hand to go right through the soft, rotten wood.  Surprisingly, the door was very hard on this side.  I scraped my fingers against it.
“Ouch!” I yelped, pulling back my sore knuckles. 
I grabbed at the handle.  I pushed and pulled.  It was no use.  I was locked in! 
At first, I thought that I was just being silly.  Surely I couldn’t be trapped inside an old house that was practically falling down.  I could probably just break through one of the walls!  I laughed to myself and turned back around.  “Nooo!”  I let out a scream!
Someone was standing in the back corner of the room, staring at me!

Class Action 5-8-06
I remembered another time that I had been lost, 5 years before.  I had been seven at the time.
My mom had taken me shopping at the mall.  It was right before the start of school, and all of the stores were having great back-to-school sales.  My mom had wanted to buy me some new shoes, but I had other things in mind.  I had been dying to get my hands on a Write n’ Wash Bear just like my best friend Courtney. 
It wasn’t much of a toy.  It was really just a plain old teddy bear made of cotton that you could write on with special markers.  When you were done, you could throw it in the wash and it would come out good as new, ready to be marked on again.  But I had been seven, and I had wanted one.
I had stood patiently while my mom made me try on every pair of shoes in Sears.  Well, it had seemed like it anyway.  After buying me a pair of pink and white walking shoes, she had decided to stroll over and look at some purses.  My mom was a purse freak!  She had at least fifty purses stuffed in her closet.
While she was busy looking over the latest purses, I had taken my chance and slipped away.  I had thought that I had known exactly where to go.  Of course, being seven, I really hadn’t had any idea which way to go. 
Wandering in the sea of people moving and shoving all around me, I had quickly become lost.  I had been so scared.  I had started to cry.  I had finally panicked and had started to scream.  Luckily, a screaming seven year old isn’t something to be ignored.  My mom had been looking for me and had come running.  She had grabbed me by the arm and had practically dragged me from the store.  Although I had still been sniffling when we had gotten home, I had never felt so safe and calm as when my mom had come to my rescue.
Nobody’s coming to your rescue now, I thought to myself, as I stared around me, trying to see something that looked familiar.
Suddenly, I did hear something familiar.  A low chirping sound came from overhead.  I looked up and saw the blue bird sitting above me.
“You again,” I said, as the bird continued its song, “You got me into this mess.  I wish you could get me out of here!”
Like it could understand me, the bird flew down to a low bush a few feet away and started to sing again.  Had it understood me?  Impossible, but I was desperate.
“I must be crazy,” I said to myself as I stood up and made my way toward the bush.
As I got closer, the bird took off and flew about 12 more feet before it landed on some low hanging branches.  It looked at me with it shiny little eyes.  Hurry up! they seemed to plead. 
Was I crazy?  Here I was, lost in the forest because I had been silly enough to follow a bird.  Yet still, I followed that same bird.  Or was it even the same bird?  It looked like it, but it could have been any blue bird.  Did I know what I was doing?
No.  I didn’t.  But I really didn’t have much of a choice at the moment.  I had read somewhere that birds fly around in the same general area looking for food or nesting material.  If this was the same bird that I had followed into the forest, perhaps it would be returning to the same spots and would lead me back to camp.  So, I kept following the bird as it continued to stay a few feet ahead of me the entire time.
The bird never once went out of sight.  It kept stopping and looking back at me, waiting for me.  I know that it sounds unusual now, but at the time, I was so grateful for anything to follow. 
Suddenly, the threat of the storm overhead crashed down upon me.  At first, it was just a drop or two coming through the leaves.  As it began to rain harder, the drops started to fall even harder.  I was starting to get really wet.  Another crash of thunder, louder than it had been so far, made me jump and scream.  I needed to get to some sort of shelter.
I was afraid that the bird would become frightened of the storm and fly away.  However, it still stayed just ahead of me.  It looked back, chirped twice, and disappeared under some dark, looming trees.  I ran, trying to catch up.  As I walked underneath these large trees, I noticed that the ground became drier.  The leaves of the trees were very thick in this part of the forest.  They were so thick that they blocked the rain from getting in. 
It was darker in this part of the forest as well.  I stood there for a minute, letting my eyes adjust to the gloom.  I was just happy to be out of the rain.  It crossed my mind that I surely hadn’t been this way this morning.  I would have surely remembered these large trees.  They were enormous!
Up ahead, the bird was actually sitting on the ground!  Its little feet hopped and bounced a few feet and then it flew up into the branches and vanished.
“No!” I cried out, running toward the tree where it had gone.  I couldn’t lose sight of it now!
I scanned the limbs, but I didn’t see it anywhere.  I could feel the hot tears starting to burn at my eyes again.  My heart was pounding in my ears, and I felt sick to my stomach.  Now I was really lost!  Why had I followed that stupid bird?
Try to look at the bright side.  At least you’re out of the rain! I thought to myself, once again brushing away the tears.  I swallowed down the lump that had formed in the back of my throat and looked around.
“Hey!”
I let out a little cry when I looked deeper into the gloomy darkness under the large cluster of trees.  There was something up ahead!  My heart started to pound with excitement as I slowly took a few steps deeper into the forest.  It was a house.

Class Action 5-3-06
Hi everyone.  I thought that I would work on a little story for some light summer reading.  I don’t really know where this is going right now….so enjoy the ride!
I heard the first cracklings of thunder and my heart started to race. 
Perhaps it was because I was all alone in the forest.  So green and dark, it seemed to stretch on for eternity.  The dark shadows under the trees twisted themselves into strange creatures that beckoned with long claws.
I sighed deeply and looked down at the map.  “Come on Beth.  You can do this.  How hard can it be to find your way back to camp?”
I stumbled over a log that was lying across the path.  At least, I hoped that I was on a path.  How could I have gotten lost so quickly?
My heart was still racing.  I was panicking, and every guide book that I had read warned against it.  Getting lost was bad.  Panicking while you were lost was even worse.  I forced myself to stop and sit down on the log.  It was soft and damp from the morning shower.  I could feel moisture soaking into my jean shorts.  It seemed as though another storm was on the way, as I heard yet another rumble from above.
I took one last, long look at the useless map that I held in my hands.  It was hopeless.  I had no clue whatsoever as to where I was.  I closed my eyes and tried to rethink my way through the day.
It was early summer and my dad had surprised my mom, my younger brother, and me with a surprise camping trip on our way to visit some of his relatives in Kentucky.  Now, you have to know my dad.  He isn’t one for state parks and camp grounds.  He is a real back-to-nature type of person who loves to really rough it in the wild outdoors.  So, instead of spending the night in a campground, we had all set up a tent in the woods.  It was a little creepy, camping with nobody else around for miles, but my dad had made it a lot of fun, joking and telling stories until late in the night.
This morning I had woken up early and decided to take a short hike into the woods.  It had been so calm and peaceful.  Everything was so fresh after a quick morning shower.  Even the air smelled sweet.  I didn’t want to wake up my parents or my pesky brother, Jake, so I quickly grabbed a map of the area and slipped out of camp.  I hadn’t intended on going very far. 
Then I had seen the bird.  It was the bluest bird that I had ever seen in my life, and it was just sitting there, in the lowest branches of a willow tree right in front of me.  It was so close that I had felt like I could just reach out and touch it.  I had held my breath and had slowly stretched out my hand.
Suddenly, the bird had given a sharp chirp that sliced through the morning silence.  With a flash of blue, it had taken off.  I had thought that it was gone for good, but soon I had heard a sweet chirping and had looked up.  There, not 10 feet away, had been the blue bird.  Mesmerized, I followed it deeper and deeper into the forest.  I don’t know how long I had walked when I suddenly realized that I was lost.
So now, here I sat, my shorts getting soggier by the moment.  I could feel hot tears start to burn my eyes, and I quickly brushed them away.  I was not going to let myself cry.  My dad would say that was being such a girl.  So what? I thought to myself, I AM a girl!  But still I brushed the tears away.  Crying wouldn’t do much good now anyway.
I sat for a few minutes, looking around.  The forest didn’t seem so inviting anymore.  A large plop of water dripped from one of the leaves overhead and hit me on the nose.  One thing that I did know was that I wasn’t going to keep on stumbling blindly through the trees.
“Help!”
My voice echoed through the slender, jumbled branches.  Of course, there was no reply.  I didn’t even hear an echo.
I took a deep breath and called out again.  Nothing.  My heart started to race again.  This wasn’t good at all. 
What is going to happen to Beth?  Find out next week!  Until then…class dismissed!

Class Action 4-21-06
When men are young, they usually can’t afford really nice cars.  Take for example, the new Mustang.  It is one sharp car.  However, when these same men get older and can afford them, everyone says that they are going through a “mid-life crisis.”  Then, there are those stuck in the middle…like me.  My wife says that I am too old to be considered young enough for a Mustang.  But at 34, I’m too young to be going through a mid-life crisis.  According to her, I have to wait another 6 years, have my crisis, and then I can buy a Mustang.  Will I even want one by then?
Who made up the term mid-life crisis anyway?  It is one of those psycho-babble terms that someone with too much time on their hands came up with.  Sort of like the word MAN-opause.  I guess that women were feeling a little guilty since they have menopause and all.  Believe me, they don’t have to!  I could have gone my whole life without hearing the word man-o-pause.  What are we supposed to be pausing anyway?
There are too many people in the world thinking up too many words for us to use instead of using the ones that we already have correctly.  Did you know that the word “ain’t” is in the dictionary now?  How many of you grew up with your parents and teachers telling you that “ain’t” wasn’t in the dictionary.  We can’t do that now!  Our kids will grab a dictionary and point to it faster than anything.  They might not be able to add 2 and 2 together, but they will go out of their way to prove their parents and teachers wrong….LOL! 
Also, were you aware that the word Google was added to our language recently as a verb instead of a noun?  As most of you know, Google is the internet directory where you can search for websites and other information online.  Well, now, Google is also a verb.  When someone says that they are going to Google something, they mean that they are going to use the Google website in order to look up information on it.  For example, I could say, “I am going to Google the new Mustang!”  My wife could say, “I am going to Google…pushing you down the stairs.”  Or something like that!
Like I said before, there are too many people making up too many words.  Just take a listen around you sometime.  Half the people in the world today can’t even speak the words that we do have.  The other half can’t spell them correctly!  And the other half can’t do math.  If you are saying to yourself that you can’t have three halves…then you know that I am in that last half!  LOL!
Maybe I’ll make up a new word so that I can justify getting that new Mustang.  Something like…..pre-flash.  You know….like a preview of my mid-life crisis.  If women can have hot flashes, then I can have a pre-flash.  I’ll fix it by cranking up the air-conditioning….in my new red Mustang!  Hey, that could even help Lisa if she has a hot flash!  Now I just have to make sure that she doesn’t read this article….LOL!
So if you see me driving around Jackson in a new car, don’t think that I’m having a crisis.  I’m not.  I’m just me being me.  And if you don’t see me driving around Jackson for a while….that means that Lisa read this article and I’m in the hospital!  Until next time….class dismissed!

Class Action 4-14-06
This weather is so beautiful.  Today, it was in the low eighties and felt like a summer day.  I took that kids out at school and let them have fitness time.  That is what we call it now at school.  Students don’t have recess or playtime anymore.  It is called fitness time.  Anyway, they really enjoyed their fitness time because the weather was very nice.
At home, my beagle Sadie is really enjoying the weather as well.  When we lived in Jackson, her whole outside experience consisted of the backyard.  She really loved that yard!  She would walk around and around, sniffing the ground and making those little beagle howls.  Now, she has the run of the entire woods behind our house. 
She runs up into the woods each day and starts barking.  She chases birds and rabbits and all sorts of other forest critters.  I’m not sure, but I think that she is looking for the fence.  She must think that this is the biggest fenced-in yard in the world!  I am so happy that she is having such a good time.
Now that I think about it, how many of us are living in our own fenced-in yard?  I’m not talking literally here.  Think about it…what is your yard?  Is it that you don’t exercise because you don’t have the time?  Is it that you don’t spend time with your family because you have been spending more and more time at work?  Perhaps your yard is your fear of failure…so you never try new things.  Every one of us has a yard…we just have to know how to escape it every now and again.  There is whole wide world out there kiddies!
My mom read my article last week about my great uncle General and his trouble with the ladies in Chicago.  She told me a story about how she had some trouble with language as well.
Several years ago, she took my dad’s aunt Laura to the store to buy some clothes.  I’m not sure, but I think that it was the old Rose Brothers store when it was still over in downtown Jackson.  Anyway, while they were there, Laura kept asking for step-in’s.  My mom didn’t really know what these were, but she assumed that they were stockings.  My mom asked her if she wanted them up to her knees or down around her ankles.  Laura just looked at her and said, “No!  No!  Step-ins!  You know….panties!”  My mom’s face must have been bright red that day.  She still laughs about it even now….LOL!
I hope that everyone out there is taking some time to laugh and have enjoy each day.  Every day is truly a miracle.  Let’s experience the miracles in life!  I would love to hear from some of you.  Feel free to email me at alfugate@yahoo.com.  Also, visit my website at http://www.alonzofugate.com.  Until next time…class dismissed.

Class Action 4-13-06
I took my dad to Lexington last week for a doctor’s appointment.  On the way, my dad told me the funniest story that I had ever heard about my great uncle, General Lee.  General died when I was very young, so I never knew him.  Also, for some reason, everyone in the family pronounced his name with a real Southern drawl.  Up until last week, I thought that his name was Gennel.  Go figure.
Anyway, my great uncle General had moved to Chicago during the late 60’s to find work.  As you may know, there was a huge migration of people from the Appalachian area at this time in history.  Several thousands of people flocked to the north to find work in the factories of Indiana and Illinois.  You may still have family in the area today.
General was living in Chicago at this time and was trying to find work.  Unfortunately he couldn’t read or write.  So, he got one of his friends to fill out his employment application for him.  His friends decided to play a joke on him and wrote down on his application that he had graduated high school and had gone to two years of college.  When he turned in his application, the company put him in an office position.  I am not sure what they wanted him to work on, but it involved a lot of paperwork.  They kept checking on him throughout the day, but he never seemed to make any progress.
Finally, his supervisor asked him if anything was wrong.  General said that he didn’t know what they wanted him to do. 
“You went to school, didn’t you,” his supervisor asked him, “Surely this shouldn’t be too hard for someone with your education.”
“Yeah,” my great uncle stated, “I went to school for a lot of years.  I just never could learn anything!”
Needless to say that General didn’t get to keep his cushy office position for long.  He ended up the day working with the custodial staff.  From what Dad said though, he never did keep one job for very long.  He was a Jack of all trades.
Another story that involved my great uncle General dealt with the problems that people often have with language barriers.  As I stated before, I had always thought that his name was Gennel because that is how everyone in my family has pronounced it all these years.  Well, in Chicago, it is obvious that there would be a language difference.  This caused some problems for my great uncle.
One day, he went to the drug store on the corner to buy a pitcher so that he could keep cold water in the refrigerator.  When he went into the store, he told the ladies that were working that he was looking for a “picture.”  Confused, they brought him a picture album and several picture frames.  General just kept on getting angrier and angrier.
Finally, he said, “No!  I want a picture!  Something to make water in!”
Of course, what he really meant was something to keep water in.  However, the workers had something else in mind.  They brought him a bedpan!!!  You can imagine my great uncle’s response.  Needless to say, I can’t put it in print…LOL!
I wish that I could have gotten to know my great uncle better.  He seemed like he really enjoyed life and lived it to the fullest.  I hope that each of you is doing the same.  Until next time…class dismissed!

Class action 4-3-06
We have officially been in the season of spring for over a week, and it is finally starting to feel like it.  Maybe I am just cold natured.  I don’t know.  All that I know is that I am ready for some warm, sunny weather.  It has been a cold, wet winter, and I am sure that almost everyone is ready for some warmth.  Whatever happened to that global warming they are all warning us about, anyway? 
It is just amazing to see all of the plants starting to wake up from their winter sleep.  Spring is truly a season of miracles where the “dead” return to life.  The sun was dead….distant and cold.  Now, it has returned.  The plants were “dead” without leaves or signs of life.  Now, they are starting to green up.  We can all rejoice in the new beginnings all around us.
When I was growing up, spring was a time for burning off the fields and getting them ready for planting.  I can remember my mom and dad burning off the grasses and dead weeds from the winter.  The smell of smoke in the air mixed with the scent of fresh earth and the sounds of birds singing their joyful tunes to the sky.  This was truly a blessed time in my life.  How nice it is to see these same fires burning even today.  On the way home today, I passed several small fires as people get their own little plots of land ready for the planting.
I asked my class today how many of them helped out in the garden during the summer months.  You may be surprised, but almost every one of the kids in my class raised their hand.  I know that as a people, the Appalachian folk aren’t as self-sufficient as we once may have been.  However, it is refreshing to see that some things still live on.  The gardens may have gotten smaller, but they are still there.  Some things haven’t changed.  I hope that they never completely do.
Getting back to new beginnings, my wife and I are starting a new life in our home.  I had told you all last week about our hard water.  Well, we got a water softener and it is doing an excellent job!  I am so impressed!  The people at Sears were very helpful….thanks to everyone there.  It is like pure rain water coming out of the tap now!
This week, I would like everyone to take some time to think about new beginnings.  The Earth is literally waking up around us.  Go outside and breathe in some of that sacred spring air.  Rejoice for Mother Earth and celebrate a little.  Spring break is next week for schools in the Breathitt County School System.  What a great opportunity to take some time with your family and just exist in the moment.  Let it wash over you.  If you just take some time to be still (which isn’t easy in today’s fast-paced world) then you might just be amazed at what you see.
Every plant is a miracle.  Every bird song is an act of joy.  Be joyful.  Life is too short to not look for the everyday miracles. 

Class Action 3-24-06
I am so glad that I built a home in the country so that I could relax.  Let me tell you though…I have never been so tired!  As I am writing this, I feel like I could crawl into bed and hibernate like an old grizzly bear for about three months.  Perhaps I’ll be a bear in my next life…or a sloth.  Some people say that I am half sloth already…LOL!
What a week!  First of all, our water is hard.  This means that it has minerals in it that makes it not work well with our plumbing and appliances.  It isn’t that bad, but it is enough to get on my nerves.  I had it tested, and it had a hardness factor of 18.  We also have an iron index of 5.  Our new water softener from Sears will take care of both problems. 
I am glad to say that I learned something new today.  I learned that it isn’t sulfur that gives most water in our area that rotten egg smell…it is iron.  I learned that if water has sulfur then it will smell like rotten eggs all through the house because sulfur is a gas.  I also found out that it is next to impossible to get rid of sulfur.   I was told that most people in this area have iron in their water but think that it is sulfur because it has that smell.  Go figure!
Another hassle that this week has held is the fact that I am trying to get my DSL connected.  When I lived in Jackson, it was easy to get DSL through BellSouth.  Now that I am in “the sticks,” I am finding that it isn’t so easy.  In order to get DSL, I am getting service provided by DirecWay.  DirecWay is a satellite-based DSL provider.  What this means is that there is a dish in my backyard that beams and receives information to a satellite.  Pretty cool, huh?
At least, it would be if it worked.  The poor guy who came to install my DirecWay last night worked for about 8 hours and didn’t get it going.  I think that it was faulty equipment.  I could be that something isn’t grounded right.  I don’t know for sure.  All that I know is that I am still on dial-up…..slow, slow dial-up.  Let me tell you, it is hard going from DSL back to AOL.  I am going through withdrawal symptoms…I can feel another bout of the shakes coming on!
So, life isn’t perfect.  But then again, who said that it ever was.  Everyone has problems.  Everyone thinks that their problems are the most important problems in the world.  They are right.  To them and at that time, their problem is the most important.  However, in the grand scheme of things, most of our problems are small in comparison to others.  The world isn’t going to come to an end if I don’t have DSL or perfect water.  I know that there are people out there with worse problems than mine. 
So tomorrow the sun will come up.  Well, hopefully.  But then, if it doesn’t and the world DOES end then you won’t be reading this paper anyway.  Hey…if the world does end, maybe I can blame it on my hard water!  Now there’s a thought!
But seriously, the next time that someone comes to you with a problem, take some time to listen to them and give it serious thought.  To them, it is the most important thing in the world at that time.  I know that we get busy with our day to day routine….but we should never be too busy for someone in need.  People are more important than anything.  Put people first.  When the time comes, they just may put you first as well. 

Class Action
By Alonzo Fugate
http://www.alonzofugate.com